I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
