but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
