I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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