I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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