But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
