Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
