its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
