I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
