also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
