Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
