is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
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