Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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