Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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