OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
