What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
