you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
