Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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