Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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