Christians are straight up FREAKS
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
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