wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i came on her dog
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
