stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
