How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize