went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
