We need to rekindle our bromance
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize