i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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