I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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