yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
