Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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