i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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