found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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