question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
