My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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