He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
