But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize