I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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