My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize