I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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