Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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