I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize