I want to walk on stilts...naked
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
