super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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