Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
