just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
