Christians are straight up FREAKS
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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