I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
