Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
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