I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
