How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
