he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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