I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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