He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize
