i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
